Why meaningful feedback is the foundation for intentional leadership growth
A friend of mine, Steve Woodruff – known as the “King of Clarity” – uses what he calls a Memory Dart: a short, memorable phrase that captures an important idea.
One of my favorites is:
“You can’t read the label of the jar you’re in…”
It perfectly captures one of the central challenges of self-awareness in leadership.
We experience ourselves from the inside. We know our intentions, our thought process and the effort we are making. However other people experience us from the outside – through our words, decisions, behaviors and the impact we have on them.
Those two perspectives are not always the same.
Most professionals receive surprisingly little meaningful feedback. Performance reviews may provide some, but they are often shaped by organizational processes and immediate business priorities. Colleagues may see important strengths or blind spots yet hesitate to share them for a variety of reasons.
As a result, we can spend years inside the jar without ever clearly seeing the label.
An Outside Perspective
Self-awareness is the foundation of my executive coaching process. I typically combine a behavioral style and motivational drivers assessment with confidential 360-degree interviews conducted with trusted colleagues.
Neither source tells the whole story. Together, however, they can reveal meaningful patterns:
- Strengths that others value more than the leader realizes
- Behaviors that are having an unintended impact
- Differences between intention and reception
- Opportunities to become more deliberate and effective
This isn’t about collecting criticism or producing a report…It is about gaining the perspective needed to pursue intentional positive change.
Start by Asking
You don’t need a formal coaching engagement to begin. Consider asking a few trusted colleagues:
“What is one strength I should use more intentionally –
and one thing I could do differently to increase my effectiveness?”
Then listen without explaining, defending or immediately deciding whether they are right. Look for patterns and remain curious.
Self-awareness does not require accepting every piece of feedback as fact. It requires being willing to consider how others experience you – and what you might learn from that perspective.
An executive coach can make this process more confidential, objective and structured. But the essential first step is the same:
Invite someone you trust to help you read the label.
SOURCE NOTE Steve Woodruff writes about clarity, communication and the value of outside perspective. Read more in “The Best Memory Dart Ever…and I Didn’t Create It.”